I was sitting under my mosquito net just now, listening to my host-mom’s pig squealing in the backyard and worrying about my 2-year old host-cousin Elias who had to go to the hospital today, when I suddenly remembered that today my DVD player got fixed. Until today, I didn’t have the right software downloaded onto my new Acer netbook in order to read the DVD files from my external drive. Now, I could finally, after 8 weeks of suspense, watch the “Advice” video that my family made for me before I left. Each of my family members and friends at my going away party was videotaped by my brother Bryan, giving me their parting words and/or words of advice. As soon as I remembered, I ran to get out my netbook, hooked it all up, and settled in for a little listening session. I was going to ration them out and only listen to one per day, but it was too tempting so I listened to the whole thing.
Luckily, I closed the door to my bedroom first, because this video made me laugh and cry all in the same 20 minutes. If my host family had heard these small outbursts of emotion, especially the crying, they would have been very curious and concerned. I was really grateful for all the advice that my family & friends offered to me… but even more important was the general moral support and words of encouragement that they all offered. Knowing that they are proud of me, that they miss me, and that they are happy I’m here make my emotional load much easier to deal with. As somebody who greatly values family, I sometimes find myself plagued with guilt at missing out on family events and losing touch with the individuals who are most important to me. Feeling as though they support my decision to be here has been important to my coping process.
